Where did we go wrong?

From September 22, 2008

This one is for review, for all of you out there that still need this pounded into your heads.  I know, this is not easy to take.  People are hungry.  People are losing money.  People want hope but deprive me of any.  People think it is impossible I have as many famous enemies as I do.  People still want to think a strange psychic foretold all the good things in 1977 and helped me.

To tell you the truth, my world and yours turned upside down that night.  For all I know he did not help me one bit.  The aura exercise was not something that was necessary.  I might have become strong enough to be me via any other route.  The blame lies with me for asking the "Will I ever get married?" question.  

Pandora's Box was opened then.  I have tried to hold it intact.  The rest of you destroyed it.  Oh, well.

Let's review.  What could we have done differently?  Where do I begin?  This list is practically endless:

Considering my feelings instead of your career and filling your holes would have been good.

Killing my sister as you were assigned instead of getting a nose job.

Not consorting with the man that killed Chris Wallace and shot me.

Putting Kamil on trial and convicting him.

Getting real instead of making gestures.

Consulting with me instead of psychics.

Making an offer for the futon instead of barging into my apartment uninvited or trying to steal it.

Not getting your boyfriend to try and kill me.

Knowing once the OLD TESTAMENT Scriptures changed you were given the first warning.  Not waiting for the last one.

Remembering Christ means King not the person that should be killed.

Inviting me to your country rather than bet on when I might show up.

Not putting a group of twenty-somethings in charge of Customs.

Speaking to me with words not attempting telepathy.

Taking care of my things not trashing them.

Caring about me more than my blood, my semen, or any of my possessions.

Inviting me to see a place that should be mine in Brazil, not inviting Nicole to make a video there.

Evicting people who break the rules, not making exceptions based on money, attractiveness, or color of skin.

Telling the truth.

Helping me rather than waiting for Fergie.

Not trying to make me believe bad things are good things.

Not asking me when people are going to die.

Not experimenting with fusion planet-side.

Not believing strangling someone in front of me when I least expect it is a great idea.

Not buying into the rest of the world is doing it, so I might as well try.

Remembering to Follow the Golden Rule, and not The Ends Justify the Means.

Giving, rather than taking.

Knowing that most of the time seeing is believing.

Learning to handle the truth and not ignoring it.

Realizing "Come To Me, Defenses Down" has to be done on time.

Not waiting for three dead blue whales.

Realizing that somethings are always right, somethings are always wrong and possessions, fashion, and momentum are fleeting.

The three most important pieces of advice I ever got from my family.

My Mom: God always walks with you.

My Grandmother: Take Care of Yourself.

My Dad: No one gives a shit.

Sorry.  Too late to apologize.  I cannot write your happy ending for you.